Gender Matters IV – Last One!

This might sound weird, but I try to think like a man. Imagine one of those CIA intelligence movies where you have to think like the enemy to predict their next move and succeed in the mission! That’s what it’s like for women today. The world is supposed to be “equal opportunity” but it’s not because women are playing catch-up. Being able to think like a man will help women in business and in relationships.

Men often complain that women are unpredictable and overthink everything. I want to be the kind of woman men listen to and respect. Starting in college, I simplified my thought process. This means that I try not to do or say anything that doesn’t have a logical reason behind it. Emotions make life complicated. Instead of responding from emotion, taking a minute to think about the reasons behind the emotion will reduce stress and produce clearer communication. I’ve been generally successful because I don’t waste as much time worrying about what people will think.

I’m one of those people who follows Forbes on Twitter and watches TED talks… From one of these sources, I learned that in life, men are more likely to “fake it till they make it”, while women prove their performance before taking on responsibilities. In general, women doubt themselves and men take more chances. So this means we have fewer female CEOs, fewer female entrepreneurs and fewer women on the boards of directors. Ultimately, women are self-defeating by nature. I decided that if I have just as much experience and ability, I’m not going to give myself any excuses.

A guy I dated in college used to say, “I want to be with someone who likes me just the way I am.” He’s a really great guy, don’t get me wrong, and at first I didn’t think twice about it. I continued to reassure him that I did like him and I would list off the reasons. After a while, he started consistently making an unwise life decision and refused to listen when I suggested we get advice on the problem. He stated the same reason as above. This made his position untenable. Everyone is going to change over the years and learn from their mistakes. Refusing to change for someone in a situation like this is both selfish and unrealistic. In the past, women were expected to be compliant and submissive. Now women are not only recognized as being as smart and capable as men, but they are expected to be as successful and independent as men. I hope that I fall for a guy who sees both my weaknesses and strengths and wants to make me into the best version of myself.

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